I'm a Big Yes!
Now what?
A conversation with non-indigenous people about how to talk to other non-indigenous people about voting Yes in the referendum.
My goal is that at the end of this you get super active in the Yes23.com.au campaign and feel awesome about having enthusiastic conversations with people who have genuine questions about why they might vote Yes.
Well first of all...
Congratulations!
You are a bloody legend and your enthusiastic Yes makes all the difference.
Now...
The most profound thing you can do to support the Yes campaign is...
Share your enthusiasm.
You don't have to convince anyone of anything, you don't have to make an argument, you don't have to be ‘right’ or ‘perfect’ or ‘know all the answers’. Every opportunity you get to confidently say...
“I'm a Big Yes!
This is one of the most exciting moments in Australian history where we get to come together and do something positive. I can't wait to vote Yes!”
Your clarity and enthusiasm gives people hope. It fills the conversation with a feeling of potential and possibility. If you leave that feeling with one person a day that's a significant contribution to the Yes conversation.
“But Luke, what if someone debates me, or asks me a question, or challenges my enthusiasm with pessimism...what do I do then?”
Ok. This is really, really important.
You can simply say...
“Wow, you've got some questions/strong views on the matter...I'd recommend going to the yes23.com.au website to find answers. Me, I'm an enthusiastic Yes - that's all I know!” and then change the topic. Yep. You are 100% allowed to do that.
You don't have to do anything other than be enthusiastic.
“But, what if I want to talk to people about why I'm an enthusiastic Yes?
What if I want to answer questions and change hearts and minds and help make this most incredible thing happen?
What do I do now!!!!???”
I'm so glad you asked.
Obviously you have volunteered for the Yes23 campaign… They have lots of awesome conversation guides, and activities you can get involved in.
Then we need to focus on spending our enthusiasm wisely. We don't want to waste a drop! It's precious. And if we invest it wisely it will build and build and build and generate more and more and more momentum.
How do I make sure I am spending my enthusiasm wisely?
First
I like to consider if this conversation is worth investing my enthusiasm in.
To make that decision I think about the 3 different kinds of votes that are out there... There's...
Yes.
I’m confidently voting yes (that’s you! yay for you!)
Yes but/No but/Maybe.
I’ve got a position but I’ve got lots of questions about my position.
No.
I’m absolutely committed to voting no.
I like to work out if someone is a committed No. Then...change the topic. Save my energy. State clearly for anyone else listening on that I am an enthusiastic Yes vote and happy to chat with anyone about why I’m voting Yes, and then change the topic.
Why?
Because our enthusiasm is a precious resource. And someone who is a committed No is very unlikely to change their mind (it can happen, but takes a lot of effort and, likely, a profound experience with a First Nations person. Also – diving into a messy, heated, complex argument with a person committed to voting No pulls all of the positivity and hope out of the conversation, particularly for anyone who is listening).
Honestly, it serves the No vote’s purpose. There are times and places for experts to debate these nuances. But if you are just an everyday person who wants to help...investing your energy in convincing the committed No voter to vote Yes...it's not your best bet.
“But how do I know if this person is a committed No, or if they have genuine questions they want to discuss? It can be really hard to tell the difference.”
Ask them this question...
Do you believe that First Nations people in Australia have been treated unfairly and that we, as non-indigenous people, should do everything we can to make things better for them?
Their answer will make it pretty clear.
Mostly I can tell from their body language what they really think...the words are important, but I trust my instinct. What I’m looking for is someone who has a genuine desire to address the historical injustice that First Nations people in Australia face.
If I get an inkling that they really don't want this (even if they are saying they do) then I change the topic and walk away. If they agree that something needs to be done...and then spend a lot of energy getting me to debate the technical details and the conversation feels like I would rather be sticking pins in my eyes...
Actually, that's the key, if a conversation with someone feels like I would rather be sticking pins in my eyes...
I walk away. Politely. Kindly. Without judgement. I. Walk. A. Way.
“But I think I can help...and they are really wrong and they need someone to set them straight...”
Ok, I'm not going to tell you how to spend your enthusiasm.
If you are totally into helping your best friends Mum or Dad see the light, go for it. But remember, every bit of enthusiasm you spend on them...is enthusiasm (and time) you can't spend elsewhere.
Is that really where you want to spend your enthusiasm? It's your call.
“Right, ok…but Luke, what am I going to do with all this enthusiasm I have on tap then? I've got to do something or I'll explode!”
Oh yes, yes you do.
But first...
...a quick note on something very important.
This conversation is designed to help non-indigenous people talk to other non-indigenous people about voting Yes. There is another, obviously important group to consider — First Nations people.
Here's some tips on what you might like to do if you have the opportunity to talk to a First Nations person about the referendum:
Don't assume they have the time or energy to talk to you about it.
If it seems like they do want to talk to you about it...Listen.
It doesn't matter what their position is, listen to whatever they have to tell you. Find out more, be curious listen.
It's possible what they say changes your mind, so be it, but if not you will be a much better informed Australian, which is awesome.
If they ask you your opinion, be brief and tell them the truth, whatever that is.
Ok, remember all that enthusiasm we have stored up ready to get out there and talk to people?
This is where things get really fun.
If someone is a confident Yes...I ask them how I can help them share their enthusiasm with the people in their life. I also encourage them to volunteer at yes23.com.au. I invite them to team up so we can amplify each others enthusiasm!
If someone is a ‘Yes but/No but/Maybe’ …and has questions or an ounce of curiosity...this person is the person I choose to invest my enthusiasm in.
A word of caution...
I try not to overwhelm people with my enthusiasm! The first thing I want to do is, you guessed it, listen. What might that look like? Well, the Yes23 campaign have done an amazing job of producing a conversation guide - I’d recommend downloading the conversation guide here and following their prompts, they are sterling.
Also, here's a couple of starter questions I like to use...
What are your questions about the referendum?
What are your questions about why I'm voting Yes?
Next, it’s time to really show up and…
Listen
For longer than you think.
I ask them questions to clarify their question.
When I can repeat their question back to them and they nod and they say, ‘yes – that, that's what I want to know’...then they are ready for me to provide some responses.
I do my best to genuinely, openly, kindly, and positively answer their questions.
If I get stuck, I refer them to the yes23.com.au website. And tell them I’m going to do some more reading to help myself better understand. It's ok not to know everything.
That's it.
I don't have to convince any one of anything. I don't try to win the argument or know everything. Just listen, make sure I have understood and answer as generously as I can.
In my opinion, this is a good investment of my enthusiasm. Will it work? Who knows! But it’s kind and honest and it’s positive. I reckon it builds energy rather than drains it.
And remember…
The best way to prepare yourself to be in a positive conversation with a person who is a ‘Yes but/No but/Maybe’ is the Yes23 website.
This is where you want to go for clear information about why voting Yes is the best idea.
That's it.
We're done here. There's nothing for us to do but go out and share our enthusiasm for voting a Big Yes! If you'd like to get more involved in helping the Yes vote - I'd recommend volunteering for the Yes23 campaign
Want to show your appreciation?
Why not donate to the Yes23 campaign? DONATE HERE.
About the Author:
Honestly 'author' seems a bit highfalutin for what I'd call myself. My name is Luke Hockley. I'm a maker, mover, teacher, performer, writer who likes to use my skills to create positive change in the world.
My family arrived in ‘Australia’ in the mid 1800s as free settlers, they came from England and Ireland. They eventually settled in the Western District of what is now called Victoria on the lands of the Gunditjmara, Djab Wurrung, Jardwadjali and Buandig people.
In this process land was stolen from First Nations people and great, unforgivable violence was perpetrated against them. I know very little about how my family did or didn’t interact with First Nations people.
What I do know is that I want to play a positive role in righting the wrongs of the past.
However, whilst confident that voting Yes was a good way to do that I was initially hesitant about how to talk to other people about my decision to vote Yes.
I worked through all that and landed here, a confident, enthusiastic, generous Yes voter.
Read more about why I developed this story and what The Story of is all about….
Acknowledgement of country
I’d like to acknowledge the traditional custodians of the lands on which we all live.
We pay our respects to their elders, past and present.